The very heart of your writing whilst sounding reasonable in the beginning, did not sit well with me personally after some time. Somewhere within the paragraphs you actually were able to make me a believer unfortunately just for a very short while. I nevertheless have a problem with your leaps in assumptions and you would do well to fill in all those gaps. In the event that you can accomplish that, I could definitely end up being impressed.
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The very heart of your writing whilst sounding reasonable in the beginning, did not sit well with me personally after some time. Somewhere within the paragraphs you actually were able to make me a believer unfortunately just for a very short while. I nevertheless have a problem with your leaps in assumptions and you would do well to fill in all those gaps. In the event that you can accomplish that, I could definitely end up being impressed.